When we buy it’s not really because of the “thing” we’re buying. A shoe is a really an expression of desired leadership in style and a car is an expression of achievement of freedom. Next time you’re buying something that you don’t think you need, ask yourself “when I wear or have this item, what does it truly give me?”. Now If I have this respect, freedom, or fun, what do I truly have? It’ll be something that when satisfied will TRULY make you happy.
I love doing value exercises with my clients because we see why they tick. What truly motivates them based on their values and what life will truly make them happy. The material items are bought only to reward yourself when and only when you achieve the actual value in a cash flow neutral way.
Do you notice that when we buy expensive clothes – we really are trying to get a sense of leadership or respect or achievement. Think of what you’ll really have when you have those fierce prada’s. Is it a sense of leadership for being a trendy momma? Respect from your peers? The perception of achievement from make the kind of living that would allow such booties?
And paying for expensive trips abroad? We are really looking for freedom or fun aren’t we? Think of what value of yours gets satisfied when you go to Bora Bora and do shooters and make out with the locals. 🙂
We spend lots of money on expensive holidays because we love our families or friends. Because we get joy from spoiling and being a great mom or family member. That can be had for free, right?
The key here is that we can satisfy these values in a different way in a free way. For a value of leadership instead of spending on expensive clothes or cars we can become active in local politics or be part of a community board of directors. For a value of freedom we can have stay-cations where we don’t set schedules and just enjoy the time off. For Family or Fun we can have BBQs or movie nights with friends. We can satisfy the same values without over spending and satisfying the route of the financial discretion.
When you understand your values you’ll understand a) why you spend and b) how to satisfy that value in a more positive and cash flow neutral way!
Have a great week,
Dave
